Because I was on the East Coast for a wedding, I was not able to watch either of the first two games of the Pens this year.
So, naturally, I got to watch the Pens hook, trip and slash their way to a 3-0 loss to the Phoenix/Saskatoon/Hamilton/Kansas City/Las Vegas Coyotes in a really pathetic effort. Malkin appears to have been motivated out of jealousy of Ovechkin’s 17 goals (or whatever) in 3 games by deciding to triple that output in penalty minutes.
Anyway, the otherwise dismal game was ‘enlightened’ with this gem by Pens’ lead announcer Paul Steigerwald:
“The Penguins are the sort of team that thrives on scoring goals.”
Uh, right. As opposed to all those other teams that thrive on things other than scoring goals.